Wednesday, January 11, 2012

ditching insecurity: installment uno

Last week, I posted about things I wanted to do differently in 2012.  One of the big things I said I wanted to address is my ongoing struggle with insecurities.  For some reason, the Lord has not allowed me to shake that statement, and so, it's become a commitment for me.  Ditch the insecurities and live freely as the creation God intended me to be.

I know that getting rid of those pesky seeds planted by the enemy is not going to be an easy task.  It's definitely going to be a journey.  But I'm convinced that I'm not the only one who struggles with these insecurities and so I've decided to share my journey with you along the way, with the hopes that something in my life may be able to help you in your journey.

Are you ready for this?  It's going to be quite a ride.

The first thing the Lord has really been teaching me about dealing with my insecurities is that I've got to face them head-on.  They aren't going to just disappear through passive attitudes or behaviors.  No, they are going to require full-on war.  That means that I've got to be so super and disgustingly honest about the insecurities eating at me.

Did you catch that "h" word?  HONEST?  It can be a tough one, especially for us girls.  We so often cut corners in the name of not hurting feelings, not ruffling feathers, or just out of fear of facing reality.  As long as we continue to avoid the ugly stuff brewing in the corners of our hearts and minds, we allow it to do just that:  to brew.  And fester.  And rot.  And then before we know it, we're so ridden with insecurities, little lies that have webbed into larger lies, that we're insecure about our insecurities!

Hear me out on this girls.  I am saying NO MORE.  I'm ready to get really honest.  I'm ready to face the little (or not so little) monsters and ditch them once and for all.  Are you ready?

Then let's get brutally honest.

What are you most insecure about?  Yes, I'm challenging you to be honest.  Stop and think for a minute.  What gets you worked into a tizzy the most?

Here are my top 2:
1) My physical appearance--Size, shape, skin, hair...all of that jazz.  Ick.
2) What others think of me--Did I say the right thing?  Do I come across totally incompetent/dumb/rude/whatever other negative thing I don't want to be?

These are the two areas that I'm going to begin to address, head-on, starting with numero uno.  I know it's going to be messy, but I also know it's going to be so worth it when I come to the point of accepting myself--blemishes and all--and understanding my worth in Him alone.

That's it for today, ladies.  I've got lots to ponder and pray through before I've got more to share.  Stay tuned for more thoughts and experiences on this journey.

Be brave, girls, and remember that you are so loved!
Jessie

"For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline."
2 Timothy 1:7 (NLT)

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