Truth.

Being a Christian girl in today's world is HARD. In a world where lies about yourself are thrown at you from both sides of the fence, how on earth are you supposed to know what is true? Read the post below entitled "Ten Truths for the Teenage Girl--Because It Matters Who You Become" from Living Proof Ministries.

"Dear _________________,

Life is learned as you live it, but as my mind started spinning, my fingers slowly started typing the things that I wish someone would have told me at 13 years young. And although I’m sure someone did tell me these things, I probably didn’t listen because I probably thought I already knew everything. Grin. So I’m praying that even if these words seems useless or boring to you today, that you would keep them tucked away and read them when life seems confusing or hard.

For years I’ve loved the word becoming. It’s one of those words that I’ve latched onto for different reasons and at times have even desired to start a ministry called “Becoming Ministries”. Don’t tell me you don’t think things like that, too. And if you don’t, well, just humor me. I really latched onto that word in college because I remember thinking that that season would either make me or break me. That who I chose to become in college would influence the rest of my life.

That is true, but what I realize now is that it starts long before college.

The choices you make affect who you are becoming long before you ever get to college.

You are always becoming. You never arrive. That is, until you meet Jesus face to face. Until then, it’s one long (or short the way you look at it) journey of becoming more like Jesus Christ. Because each circumstance and situation we find ourselves planted in is another opportunity to respond like Jesus would.

Hence my love for the word, becoming.

So, as you are becoming a young woman devoted to the Lord, here are a few things I’ve learned on my own journey of becoming who God has called me to be, for such a time as this:

1) God is the author of your story, not you.
That is so much easier said than lived out, but it is the Gospel truth. He has a plan and a purpose for you that is greater than you could dream up or imagine. If you think your dreams are big, imagine how big His dreams must be for you! If He is the author, He knows the beginning, the middle and the end. Nothing is too complex for Him, no detail is left unnoticed, and His timing is perfect. Sometimes life can be complicated, hard and confusing, but that’s why we have to remember that we have the God of the universe in charge of our story.

2) You are beautiful.
I want you to hear that with fresh ears. God made you unique. He made you, you. And He made you in His image. Since you bear His image, I am praying that as people see you, they would see His face shining upon you. Beauty really is fleeting, but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised. (Proverbs 31:30)

Side Note: Yes, it’s okay to like cute clothes, just don’t let that be your measure of beauty. (I mean, let’s be honest, some girls like to shop. Hand raised!)

3) Know the Word.
And know what it says about you. If I’ve learned one thing, I’ve learned that if I can’t always believe what I think about myself, and I can’t always believe what people are saying about me or what the internet says about me,  I can believe what the Lord says about me. I can rest in the truth of His word and the promises He gives.

4) Life Consists of Seasons.
Just like the four seasons come and go, so will different seasons of life come and go. Don’t despair! “This too shall pass.” is true in both sweet and bitter seasons of life. While you don’t need to wish any of it away, remember to savor the sweet seasons, take the joy when it comes and stay faithful during the bitter seasons. Worship in the good times and bad. Jesus will be faithful over and over and over again. It’s in the valleys that God develops your character.

5) Be Humble.
At church my pastor always tells us to “go low”. Going low means being humble, staying humble, becoming a servant instead of searching for the spotlight. Serve, serve, serve. Invest, invest, invest in people. Never get too comfortable in your routine that you can’t go out of your way to help somebody else. Work quietly with your hands and your Father in Heaven will reward your faithfulness. Be faithful in the small things. You’ll never be too good to do something “meaningless”.

6) Be bold.
In a world of social networking, we can hide behind our computer, our phones, or our iPads. Be bold. Learn how to communicate face to face. It’s a life skill that’s becoming extinct, especially to our teenagers. Refrain from posting things online that you wouldn’t say to someone in person. Passive-aggressiveness (posting something for all to see when you only mean it for one to see) is not attractive.

7) True Love Waits.
I don’t mean that in the way you hear it in church all the time. Staying pure until marriage is a gift, by all means, yes, pursue purity. It’s much harder than you think in the sex-saturated world we live in, but whether you believe it or not, it’s possible. What I mean is, wait for a man that will pursue you, not confuse you. (And be careful not to be the one doing the confusing, either. We girls certainly know how to manipulate.) Wait for a man that will protect your purity, not use it. You are responsible for how you present yourself; so present yourself in a way that’s worth protecting. Sex doesn’t equal love, so wait for a man that loves and respects you enough to practice restraint towards you instead of giving into temptation before marriage. Building a relationship and romance takes time, something we’ve lost the art of in a world with technology at our fingertips, so don’t feel pressure to rush things. Remember, before you are someone’s wife, you are first their Sister in Christ, so don’t settle for less than being treated like a Sister. Your future husband will admire and value you. But also remember, there is forgiveness in Christ. You are not your past; your future spouse is not his past. The Lord redeems and renews. Praise God! But be patient in the waiting. (That’s coming from a girl whose story is still being written. It’s not easy at all. Not one ounce is easy. But Jesus is good and He is better.)

8) Pursue Your Calling.
You may not know what the Lord is calling you to do today, and that’s okay. But pursuing your calling is a bold and courageous thing. Run after the things that make your heart swell. Ask questions, ask for wisdom. Be friends with those younger than you, older than you and in the same season as you. Do things you love to do. Make a plan, but keep in mind that you can make all the plans in the world, but the Lord is the one who directs each of our steps.

9) Your Words Matter.
Speak kind words to, in front of, and behind your friend’s backs. And make sure your words and your actions line up with each other. Be honest. Be loving. Be kind. Be generous. A lady named Maya Angelou once said, “I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.” Make people feel loved with your words and actions. In a world of email and text messaging, don’t loose the wonder of snail mail.

10) Laugh.
You are never too old or too young to simply stop and have fun on this journey of life. Laugh until your stomach hurts. Laugh with your friends. Laugh with your family. Enjoy life Savor it. Journal about it. Talk about your experiences. Visit places you think are interesting. When all is said and done, you don’t want anyone to remember you as a Negative Nelly. Where the Spirit of the Lord is there is freedom and joy! So own that joy, live it out and share it with those around you.

You are dearly loved, my Sister in Christ. This I know, the Lord has a plan for your life that no eye has seen, no ear has heard and no mind can comprehend or imagine. Believe it. Believe that Jesus is better.

“No one has ever seen,
 no one has ever heard,
 no one has ever imagined 
what God has prepared for those who love him.” 1 Corinthians 2:9

“3 So trust in the Lord and do good.
Live on your land and be dependable.
4 Enjoy serving the Lord, and he will give you whatever you ask for.
5 Depend on the Lord. Trust in him, and he will help you.
6 He will make it as clear as day that you are right.
Everyone will see that you are being fair.
7 Trust in the Lord and wait quietly for his help.
Don’t be angry when people make evil plans and succeed.
8 Don’t become so angry and upset that you, too, want to do evil.
9 The wicked will be destroyed,
but those who call to the Lord for help will get the land he promised.
10 In a short time there will be no more evil people.
You can look for them all you want, but they will be gone.
11 Humble people will get the land God promised, and they will enjoy peace.”
Psalm 37: 3-11"

Help.

There are two issues we encounter when we have a fear of asking people for help.

(Believe me, I know I'm preaching to the choir.)

Asking for help is not meant to be a burden or a cause of anxiety; it is meant to make us more vulnerable. It gives us a chance to practice on humans so it's not as scary when we ask for 

help from God. 

Issue #1: Pride

When we struggle with asking for help, there is a good chance that we are letting our big, fat, ugly pride get in the way. 

We would rather spend two hours driving around aimlessly instead of stopping and letting some stranger know that we don't have a clue where we're going. 

(I'm talking to you, dads.)

Because asking for help can sometimes be embarrassing.

We don't want to ask for help from someone who knows more about what we are struggling with because then we might look stupid.

And that, my dear ladies, is pride.

"Pride goes before destruction, and a haughty spirit before a fall." -Proverbs 16:18

When we think that we can figure it out on our own and we don't need any help, we are playing a dangerous game. 

We are saying "I got it, God, You can take a day off."

HA.

I seriously don't want to know what would happen if God took a day off from leading my blind self through life. 

It wouldn't be pretty, that's for sure.

Recognizing our pride is super important, because when we start recognizing it, we can start 

destroying it. 

Engaging in mini surrenders to Jesus on a regular basis helps rid us of our pride more easily.

These mini surrenders involve recognizing our pride, asking the Lord to remove it from us, and then asking Him to keep us humble and to reject pride when it attacks again.

Issue #2: Control

I am a control freak. 

No joke, hands down, I love being in control.

Which is great (sarcasm) because the Lord loves reminding me that I am, in fact, not in control.

However, my love of control makes it very difficult for me to feel comfortable asking people for help.

It gives me anxiety and I don't sleep for two weeks.

I have fear that if I let someone else do something, they will do it incorrectly or not finish it and then I will have to go back and redo it or finish it on my own.

This not only hold some hints of pride (who says my way is the best way), but it also causes great amounts of stress. 

And when whatever I'm attempting to do fails, because it ultimately will if I'm in complete control, I experience even more stress.

It's a vicious cycle. 

When I finally break down and ask for help, it is usually because I have completely exhausted myself and I'm on the edge of a mental breakdown/there's no way to finish everything I've taken on. 

The way to break the cycle of control and learn how to ask for help in a healthy, timely manner goes back to mini surrenders and daily reminders.

Find ways to remind yourself on a daily basis that you are not in control, and that is OKAY. 

You were not created to be in control; you were created to love God and love people, and you can't do that well if you are flooding your schedule instead of asking for help. 

"The Lord will fight for you, you need only be still." -Exodus 14:14

This week take some time and ask for help.

Maybe that means finding someone to tutor you.

Maybe it means asking for help in overcoming an addiction.

Whatever it is, remember that asking for help is not a sign of weakness; it's a sign of someone who knows their limits and wants to operate within them. 

Technology.

Congratulations!

Today I am giving you a break from my personal ramblings, and sending you somewhere else. 

I recently came across an article about the impact that social media can have on relationships.

This doesn't necessarily mean just romantic relationships.

Social media impacts your relationships with your family, your friends, your coworkers, and really anyone else you connect with on a daily basis. 

So, take some time out of your day to read this article, and then come back next week for a…

BRAND NEW BLOG SERIES. 

That's right, get excited. 

Sticky.

I am sitting here typing this with very sticky fingers due to an unfortunate french toast syrup incident. 

If there's one thing I hate more than wet socks, it's sticky fingers. 

I swear, no matter how many times you wash your hands, it's impossible to get the stickiness off.

And then, when you touch other things, those things get sticky too. 

I remember one time picking up a toy after my brother had played with it, and it was covered in syrup. So now he was sticky, the toy was sticky, and I was sticky.

Sin is sticky. 

It presents itself as something enticing and sweet, and then when you're in the thick of it, it starts to stick. And not only does it stick to you, it starts to stick to everything around you. 

And once it's stuck, it's hard to wash off. 

Obviously I'm not talking about in an eternal sense, because when you become a believer, all your sins are wiped away and covered by the blood of Jesus. 

I'm talking about how sin affects our present, earthly lives in a very real and dangerous way.

You cannot compartmentalize sin. 

Maybe not right away, but eventually, it will permeate every single area of your life. 

The devil does not care if you argue with your best friend. 

The devil cares that the arguing you're doing is causing you to think less about Jesus and more about your problems and situation. 

The goal of the enemy is to distract us, as believers, from the work we were put here to do.

"Go therefore and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father, and the Son, and the Holy Spirit." Matthew 26:19

When we allow sin to stick in our lives, we are allowing the devil to distract us from spreading the Good News. This is especially detrimental if we are in a place where a lot of our friends are not Christians. If you are partaking in sin in front of nonbelievers, you are hurting your witness for Christ. 

As Christians, we have an obligation to the furthering of the Kingdom to recognize sin in our life, repent of it, and continue seeking Christ. 

Otherwise sin may start in one area of your life, like gossip or slander in a friendship, and then slowly spread to the other areas of your life, killing everything in its path. 

If you are allowing gossip or bitterness in one part of your life, don't be so naive to believe that it won't affect every other part of your life too. 

That is the danger of sin, and why it's so important to recognize it's stickiness before we let it in to our lives. 

So, this week, before you get caught up in the sweetness that sin projects, remember the sticky residue it will leave in your heart and in your life. 

Middle.

It's the middle of the semester.

You're halfway to the halfway point! 

I know right now that summer seems like a long ways away, but I promise you it will be here before you know it. 

The middle of the semester seems to be where lots of people hit a wall. 

You're exhausted, school is actually getting hard, and extra curricular's are in full swing. 

If we're not careful, moans of "how much longer" and "is it December yet" will overtake our lives. 

The problem with this mindset is that we are wishing away the "middle". 

The middle is such a big part of life and the Lord gives us middles for a very important reason: waiting.

Boy oh boy, I do NOT like to wait. 

 We're usually impatient not because we necessarily know or want what's coming next, but because we don't like where we're at currently. 

Currently: In school

Waiting: To get out

Next Chance: Christmas Break

Currently: Single

Waiting: To be in a relationship

Next Chance: Random boy that asks you out

Chances are you really aren't excited about Christmas Break or that random boy, but you want out of your current situation, so you start looking to whatever comes next. 

News flash: that's an awful way to live life.

Because life is not perfect, once you get whatever you were waiting for, it will inevitably disappoint you in some way, and you'll start wishing for the next thing. 

On our tombstones, our birth year and our death year are written and the dash in between represents our life. 

Our "middle" is only 90 years long, if we're lucky.

So instead of wishing the middle away on things that are temporary, let's spend the middle making much of Jesus. Because guess what?

The only thing worth waiting for is the return of Jesus Christ. 

Bottom line. End of story. No questions asked. 

So, instead of wishing it was Christmas Break, wait patiently and look at the mission field around you. 

If you have 8 classes a day, and there are 25 people in each class, you have 200 opportunities to show someone the love of Jesus. 

Instead of wishing you had a boyfriend, recognize the unique freedoms you have as a single person, and use those to serve the Lord. 

Waiting patiently doesn't mean you are stagnate, it means you recognize that something else is coming, but you don't let that thing define you or your actions.

So, this week, when you are sick and tired of school and everything around you, stop and be thankful for the middle that you were given. 

Know.

"I know that there is a monumental change I'm about to experience. 
That's scary. It's also extremely freeing. There is such freedom in not knowing. Knowing causes us to worry and to want to change things, when really, the Lord has everything perfectly planned out for us. By not knowing, we can know that it is going to be amazing. 
Shocking, tough, beautiful, dirty, grace-filled, amazing things are done when we hand God the pen and let Him write on our hearts. Then we will fully know the good works of Christ. We can watch Him bring us out of the darkness and into the light. We can be secure in the safety of our future."

April 26th, 2013

I blogged this over a year ago, just two months before embarking on my first international missions trip. Little did I know how true those words were, not only for the week we spent in Italy, but for every single day since I wrote them. 

"There is such freedom in not knowing" 

If you're reading this, I'm sure you've experienced uncertainty in some area of your life.

Maybe it's with finances, maybe a relationship, or maybe a college application. 

Either way, there will come a point in your life where you simply don't know.

And that is okay. 

Really, it is.

Think of how stressful it would be to know EVERYTHING. 

Our poor little finite brains couldn't handle it; that's why God does. 

"Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is it's own troubles." -Matthew 6:34

At first that verse sounds pretty depressing. 

"Oh, each day is going to have a sufficient amount of trouble? Awesome."

No. 

Well, yes. 

Both. 

Every day there will be some point where you are not completely, entirely, happy. If you tell me I'm wrong, you are a liar. 

I'm not talking about "joy" or "peace". Those things are concrete things we acquire as believers that do not change with our circumstances.  

I'm talking about happy.

You know, "cute boy gives you a cuter puppy" kind of happy. 

If I'm not happy, I'm probably angry/sad/worried, or a combination of all of those. 

Think about the source of all of your unhappy moments.

They all, more than likely, stem from not knowing.

"I don't have a job, so I don't know how I'm going to pay for gas."

"I only applied to one school and I didn't get in, so I don't know where I'm going to college."

"My best friend moved away, and I don't know who to hang out with now."

We are not supposed to know. 

So the next time you are freaking out because you don't know, take a deep breath and remember that the Lord has a plan for you. 

We have a whole book and a whole history based on God's faithfulness to humans. 

Rest in that fact, and trust Him. 

Tough.

"Tough isn't always bad, sometimes tough is just tough." 

One of my favorite people told me this a few years ago, and the saying has stuck with me. So many times when things get tough, my first reaction is to throw my hands up in the air and sit down in defeat. Guess what happens when I do that? The enemy wins. Satan wants nothing more than for me to get going when the going gets tough. 

The past few weeks have been tough. Not tough like "oh my hair looks bad and my eyeliner is crooked", but the kind of tough where you look at all of the broken pieces of your plan on the ground and wonder how on earth they will ever make something else. 

But the past few weeks have also been incredibly powerful. I have seen so much love and support come from our students and their families. I have watched people rally together and fight. I've heard people say "we will not give up". Because when you stop fighting for the progression of the Gospel of Jesus Christ, you let Satan win. And we will not let Satan win. We will wake up every morning and know that we have the power of Christ within us, and we will persevere. Perseverance doesn't come without suffering, but it doesn't come without reward, either. Maybe that means earthly reward, and maybe it doesn't, but it always means eternal reward. 

"But even if you should suffer for righteousness' sake, you will be blessed. 

 Have no fear of them, nor be troubled." -1 Peter 3:14

Blessings and sufferings are often tied together in the Bible. Think about it: have you ever felt strongly moved by a testimony where the person tells you that their life has been completely easy and perfect, and they have never had any hardships? I doubt it. 

In order to use you greatly, sometimes He must wound you deeply. 

That seems a little unfair, doesn't it? Let me tell you: life is not fair. If life was fair we would all spend eternity in hell because of the great sins we have committed. But the good news is that life is not fair, and we have someone to cling to when life get tough. 

"My soul clings to you;

                your right hand upholds me." -Psalm 63:8

Even when life gets crazy tough, remember that it isn't necessarily bad. Maybe the Lord is using this time to shape you and grow you for something incredible. Also know that you weren't created to go through the toughness alone. You are so loved by a God who knows your every need; cry out to Him and lean on Him when you can't stand on your own. Be open and vulnerable with other believers when you are experiencing some "tough". I guarantee that not only will they come alongside you and encourage you, but they will reveal some "tough" that they are dealing with too. 

"I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world." -John 16:33

He has overcome, so that you may have victory in Him. Rest, pray, and fellowship with that knowledge.