Monday, November 10, 2014

Help.

There are two issues we encounter when we have a fear of asking people for help.
(Believe me, I know I'm preaching to the choir.)
Asking for help is not meant to be a burden or a cause of anxiety; it is meant to make us more vulnerable. It gives us a chance to practice on humans so it's not as scary when we ask for 
help from God. 

Issue #1: Pride

When we struggle with asking for help, there is a good chance that we are letting our big, fat, ugly pride get in the way. 
We would rather spend two hours driving around aimlessly instead of stopping and letting some stranger know that we don't have a clue where we're going. 
(I'm talking to you, dads.)
Because asking for help can sometimes be embarrassing.
We don't want to ask for help from someone who knows more about what we are struggling with because then we might look stupid.
And that, my dear ladies, is pride.

"Pride goes before destruction, and a haughty spirit before a fall." -Proverbs 16:18

When we think that we can figure it out on our own and we don't need any help, we are playing a dangerous game. 
We are saying "I got it, God, You can take a day off."
HA.
I seriously don't want to know what would happen if God took a day off from leading my blind self through life. 
It wouldn't be pretty, that's for sure.
Recognizing our pride is super important, because when we start recognizing it, we can start 
destroying it. 
Engaging in mini surrenders to Jesus on a regular basis helps rid us of our pride more easily.
These mini surrenders involve recognizing our pride, asking the Lord to remove it from us, and then asking Him to keep us humble and to reject pride when it attacks again.

Issue #2: Control

I am a control freak. 
No joke, hands down, I love being in control.
Which is great (sarcasm) because the Lord loves reminding me that I am, in fact, not in control.
However, my love of control makes it very difficult for me to feel comfortable asking people for help.
It gives me anxiety and I don't sleep for two weeks.
I have fear that if I let someone else do something, they will do it incorrectly or not finish it and then I will have to go back and redo it or finish it on my own.
This not only hold some hints of pride (who says my way is the best way), but it also causes great amounts of stress. 
And when whatever I'm attempting to do fails, because it ultimately will if I'm in complete control, I experience even more stress.
It's a vicious cycle. 
When I finally break down and ask for help, it is usually because I have completely exhausted myself and I'm on the edge of a mental breakdown/there's no way to finish everything I've taken on. 
The way to break the cycle of control and learn how to ask for help in a healthy, timely manner goes back to mini surrenders and daily reminders.
Find ways to remind yourself on a daily basis that you are not in control, and that is OKAY. 
You were not created to be in control; you were created to love God and love people, and you can't do that well if you are flooding your schedule instead of asking for help. 

"The Lord will fight for you, you need only be still." -Exodus 14:14

This week take some time and ask for help.
Maybe that means finding someone to tutor you.
Maybe it means asking for help in overcoming an addiction.
Whatever it is, remember that asking for help is not a sign of weakness; it's a sign of someone who knows their limits and wants to operate within them. 

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