Know.

"I know that there is a monumental change I'm about to experience. 
That's scary. It's also extremely freeing. There is such freedom in not knowing. Knowing causes us to worry and to want to change things, when really, the Lord has everything perfectly planned out for us. By not knowing, we can know that it is going to be amazing. 
Shocking, tough, beautiful, dirty, grace-filled, amazing things are done when we hand God the pen and let Him write on our hearts. Then we will fully know the good works of Christ. We can watch Him bring us out of the darkness and into the light. We can be secure in the safety of our future."

April 26th, 2013

I blogged this over a year ago, just two months before embarking on my first international missions trip. Little did I know how true those words were, not only for the week we spent in Italy, but for every single day since I wrote them. 

"There is such freedom in not knowing" 

If you're reading this, I'm sure you've experienced uncertainty in some area of your life.

Maybe it's with finances, maybe a relationship, or maybe a college application. 

Either way, there will come a point in your life where you simply don't know.

And that is okay. 

Really, it is.

Think of how stressful it would be to know EVERYTHING. 

Our poor little finite brains couldn't handle it; that's why God does. 

"Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is it's own troubles." -Matthew 6:34

At first that verse sounds pretty depressing. 

"Oh, each day is going to have a sufficient amount of trouble? Awesome."

No. 

Well, yes. 

Both. 

Every day there will be some point where you are not completely, entirely, happy. If you tell me I'm wrong, you are a liar. 

I'm not talking about "joy" or "peace". Those things are concrete things we acquire as believers that do not change with our circumstances.  

I'm talking about happy.

You know, "cute boy gives you a cuter puppy" kind of happy. 

If I'm not happy, I'm probably angry/sad/worried, or a combination of all of those. 

Think about the source of all of your unhappy moments.

They all, more than likely, stem from not knowing.

"I don't have a job, so I don't know how I'm going to pay for gas."

"I only applied to one school and I didn't get in, so I don't know where I'm going to college."

"My best friend moved away, and I don't know who to hang out with now."

We are not supposed to know. 

So the next time you are freaking out because you don't know, take a deep breath and remember that the Lord has a plan for you. 

We have a whole book and a whole history based on God's faithfulness to humans. 

Rest in that fact, and trust Him. 

Tough.

"Tough isn't always bad, sometimes tough is just tough." 

One of my favorite people told me this a few years ago, and the saying has stuck with me. So many times when things get tough, my first reaction is to throw my hands up in the air and sit down in defeat. Guess what happens when I do that? The enemy wins. Satan wants nothing more than for me to get going when the going gets tough. 

The past few weeks have been tough. Not tough like "oh my hair looks bad and my eyeliner is crooked", but the kind of tough where you look at all of the broken pieces of your plan on the ground and wonder how on earth they will ever make something else. 

But the past few weeks have also been incredibly powerful. I have seen so much love and support come from our students and their families. I have watched people rally together and fight. I've heard people say "we will not give up". Because when you stop fighting for the progression of the Gospel of Jesus Christ, you let Satan win. And we will not let Satan win. We will wake up every morning and know that we have the power of Christ within us, and we will persevere. Perseverance doesn't come without suffering, but it doesn't come without reward, either. Maybe that means earthly reward, and maybe it doesn't, but it always means eternal reward. 

"But even if you should suffer for righteousness' sake, you will be blessed. 

 Have no fear of them, nor be troubled." -1 Peter 3:14

Blessings and sufferings are often tied together in the Bible. Think about it: have you ever felt strongly moved by a testimony where the person tells you that their life has been completely easy and perfect, and they have never had any hardships? I doubt it. 

In order to use you greatly, sometimes He must wound you deeply. 

That seems a little unfair, doesn't it? Let me tell you: life is not fair. If life was fair we would all spend eternity in hell because of the great sins we have committed. But the good news is that life is not fair, and we have someone to cling to when life get tough. 

"My soul clings to you;

                your right hand upholds me." -Psalm 63:8

Even when life gets crazy tough, remember that it isn't necessarily bad. Maybe the Lord is using this time to shape you and grow you for something incredible. Also know that you weren't created to go through the toughness alone. You are so loved by a God who knows your every need; cry out to Him and lean on Him when you can't stand on your own. Be open and vulnerable with other believers when you are experiencing some "tough". I guarantee that not only will they come alongside you and encourage you, but they will reveal some "tough" that they are dealing with too. 

"I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world." -John 16:33

He has overcome, so that you may have victory in Him. Rest, pray, and fellowship with that knowledge.

Chivalry.

"Chivalry is dead." 

How many times have you heard this phrase? 

As a woman growing up in a feministic society, I've heard it plenty of times. In fact, it's been engrained in my brain. That simple phrase slips out of my mouth when a guy fails to open the car door for me or takes the recliner during movie night while I am stuck on the floor. This seemingly harmless phrase has been bouncing around in my head over the summer as I have dug deeper into the meaning of being a true woman of Christ. 

The Christian side of us begs for a man who is going to open the car door and let us have the recliner. We recognize that we are daughters of the King and deserve to be treated with respect. However, society's fascination with feminism has wrecked our view of chivalry. We are now annoyed when he opens the car door for us because "does he really think I can't do that myself?", and we begin to confuse attempted chivalry with the implications that we are incapable of completing such tasks ourselves. 

Instead of accepting chivalry as it is, we twist it into something it's not and then project it's negativity back on the guy. We demand chivalry and then express our annoyance at it when it is displayed because we insist on being strong, self-sufficient women. If someone you love is constantly getting annoyed or frustrated by something you do, don't you eventually stop doing it? Chivalry isn't dead; it's simply hidden in the hearts of men who have been consistently rejected by "independent" women. 

Ladies, letting him open the car door for you isn't going to take away your independence or identity. It's simply a small way for him to show you he cares. If you want a man who is chasing after the heart of God, he will be respectful and chivalrous because it's a desire of his heart. Don't take that away from him.

Men, don't be afraid to show us you care. When you find the right girl, she won't be scared away by acts of chivalry, but will cherish them instead. Look for a woman of Christ who is humble enough to not only accept your acts of chivalry, but thank you for them.